The Idea Of Her. Poem by G George

Up and down the staircase, Loads I heap,
A catch  Perhaps to restore my racing thoughts,
All of it at once, then back, Self I hold not

A perfect world exists, one we  cannot coexist in,  
Different  dimensions we are from, all of it,
Overlooked, yet heart aching, O neg- blood I need,
Doctors call to restore my life, in  vain

On my way, the self-sabotaging act is this
One in which I let myself feel and lie to self,  
Oh.. gaslight self that it's okay, walking out on her,
She makes me nervous in a good way,

Crossroads I  hit, a blurry hope I hang on,
A new her she'd try out this time, alone
An ideal in my head she can match and I can
Find her, all I've always imagined  her to be

My ideal.

@ ggeorge